Maybe you were 7 or 13 or 17 or 20 or 35
When you felt the first stab of queer longing and knew that you were “other.”
When you realized that the politicians and the clergy and the respectable members of the community were wringing their hands over you when they spoke about the declining morals of our culture.

When you realized that the ballot initiatives and the petition drives and the prayer circles were all for you too.
And you were filled with fear that rose through you and you were terrified at its power.
But you comforted yourself with the thought that if this fierce hole consumed your breast it could be filled…

If only you were were president of your class… If only you got into the best college… If only you were a successful attorney or businessperson or doctor… If only you were Congressman, Senator, Governor, President of the United States.

And then, perhaps years later, the realization comes that none of these things can ease the ache.
And this is the most earth shattering revelation of all because with this one comes an inevitable course of action…

You hang out at bars… You hang out at parks… You hang out in bathrooms…

You live a life along the margins of your people’s existence in which you never see their pride… Their joy… Their sense of community… The way they celebrate…

You inhabit only their places of shame… Of sadness… Of loneliness… Of desperation.

But maybe, just maybe, if you don’t become President of the United States or you get found out it will be a relief because there won’t be in any use in lying anymore and maybe, just maybe, for the first time you can see your people when they walk in the sun instead of when they hide in the shadows.

Care to share your thoughts with Tallahassee’s LGBT Community?  Send your submissions to branchingout@familytreecenter.org.  Your article, poem, song or artwork could be printed in next month’s issue!